BUY NOTHING DAY 11/28/03

WHY I WILL NEVER BUY
A GATEWAY COMPUTER

by Adam Knight
 

The ad reads Price Wars? You Won:

photo of a boy in a sweater

pushing a determined flower

into the loaded barrel

of a National Guardsman’s rifle.

More than 25,000 customers have saved

with the Gateway Guarantee.

As far as numbers go

my mind is stuck on four:

Jeff Miller, Allison Krause,

Sandy Scheuer, Bill Schroeder.

Paramus, Smithtown, Yonkers, Wappinger Falls:

Visit Gateway Country.

So give peace a chance, and get

the best price anywhere on the PC you want.

I push open the gate! World Peace—

the sacred cow (binary bovine)

falls from the sky

and lands with a thud.

"Why I Will Never Buy a Gateway Computer" © 2003 Adam Knight

Photo © 2003 Rochelle Ratner

All rights reserved.